Wednesday, August 20, 2008

A Silent Killer

Update: 1. Check out this resource by Mark Driscoll. Note that it was written for men, and that women are not advised to read it. 2. MP3 sermon by George Verwer: "Dealing with Lust" here.

In an unofficial survey of 200 or so young men I have met or know well, I know of only two who have not struggled with Internet pornography to some extent.

Pornography is a major problem for children as well as adults. (Parents, you should know that.) It is also on the rise among women/girls.

Statistics from
+ Average age of first Internet exposure to pornography: 11 years old (
+ Largest consumer of Internet pornography: 12-17 year-old age group (various sources, as of 2007)
+ More than 70% of men from 18 to 34 visit a pornographic site in a typical month (comScore Media Metrix)
+ 28% of those admitting to sexual addiction are women (
+ 57% of pastors say that addiction to pornography is the most sexually damaging issue to their congregation (Christians and Sex Leadership Journal Survey, March 2005)

So, specific tips:
+ Install the free K9 filter on your computer here. It is installed on my computer, and I have installed it on the computers of about 10 others (including one middle-aged woman who had never struggled with pornography but wanted to avoid viewing it inadvertently). Sub-tips: (A) have your accountability partner set the password, (B) have the email associated with the filter be that of your accountability partner (not yours), (C) The default settings of K9 are good, except you may want to change it to not filter social-networking sites (e.g., Facebook).

+ Have an accountability partner with whom you 'walk in the light'. A skeleton in the closet will slowly destroy you.

+ Avoid having too many accountability partners.

+ Consider installing the free X3 Accountability software here. X3 regularly and automatically emails a report of questionable sites you visit to your accountability partner.

+ Avoid high-temptation circumstances/places (i.e., "Flee from sexual immorality" - I Corinthians 6:18). Note: we are to "flee" temptation and "resist" the Devil (James 4:8); we are never exhorted to resist temptation. E.g., It would not be a good idea to walk into a brothel and then pray for the ability to resist any temptation. No, "fleeing temptation" means not going anywhere near such a place. (This is Billy Graham's policy. Hence, in part, his (long) life of integrity.) Sub-suggestion: men, avoid working home alone.

+ Walk in step with the Spirit. Maintain a healthy, deeply-fulfilling lifestyle (by working hard, serving God a lot, and investing in others). Maintain healthy relationships with members of both sexes. Pray continually. Have reality and don't kid yourself. Have a daily quiet time with the Lord. Get lots of exercise. Grow in discipline. Believe that God can renew your mind (Romans 12:1-2). Attempt to be 1,000 times more effective for God than you were last year while growing in humility.

"Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful." - Colossians 4:2


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ar TORONTO, CANADA | 2023+



27 Sat (1) 11am Commencement speaker at R. University, (2) ~3pm+ time w/ V/AR+
29 Mon (1) 9:30am VT prayer, (2) 3pm mtg DerCh - Mississauga
30 Tue (1) 10am ph call (AA), (2) 5:30pm video mtg (IsTan), (3) 8pm neighbourhood prayer mtg

1 Thu (1) 11:30am Zoom mtg (LM), (2) 4pm mtg (VS,KBr)
2 Fri (1) 10:30am ph call (PVDW; SL w/ boys; ~J working)
3 Sat SL w/ boys and MG
5 Mon (1) 9:30am VT prayer mtg, (2) 2pm Europe call, (3) 5pm mtg/walk (YM)
6 Tue (1) 11:30am lunch (GD) - St. Jacobs, (2) 4pm mtg (AF) - Cambridge, (3) 7:30pm worship night
9 Fri ~J's b'day
10 Sat North Bay trip
13 Tue 11am mtg (DAy) (~J school trip w/ ~Co | text BD)
14 Wed 9:30am time w/ BD
15 Thu 4:30pm video mtg (Paul T.)
16 Fri (1) 9am video med appt, (2) 15-km run (Prayer Journey "warm-up")
17 Sat Prayer Journey (my own: 50km GTA bike-ride; Jessie's: 5KM) and speaking at GTA after-party
23-25 Fri-Sat poss. SL
26 Mon 2pm Europe monthly call
29 ... July 7 Thu-Fri poss. holiday in Arkansas

... 7 Thu-Fri poss. holiday in Arkansas
~8-17 SA+ in Toronto; P/H Bell likely visiting too
15 Sat aft+ baptism (Saj; NaB may be coming)
17-21 Mon-Fri Kids Kapers camp
24 Mon 2:45pm med. appt
26 Wed (1) 11am video mtg (SM), (2) 3pm Zoom mtg (SMa,SB), (3) 7pm ~J speaking at Greenhouse/Zoe - UofT downtown
27 Thu 10am video MVT board mtg
31 Mon 3:05pm med. appt
July/Aug CCWM board mtg / AGM

2 Wed 11am video mtg (SM+)
6-12 Sun-Fri Cottage w/ O/DN+ and UB/AC - Windermere; plus Muskoka
19 Sat poss. ~J fam beach day - Brighton area
25-29 Fri-Tue MoveIn staff retreat - southern Ontario

Sep 21 Thu - MVT board mtg
Sep 23 Sat poss. date of GV memorial
Sep 24 Sun ~Ch's b'day
Sep ~26-28 Poss. time in Lushnjë, Albania
Sep 29 - Oct 6 MoveIn Europe Conference+ - Durrës, Albania
Oct 21 Sat poss./unlikely date of GV memorial
Oct 21-27 Dollar-a-Day week
Early Nov Poss. fundraising event - Niagara
Nov-Jan Poss. time in India - Goa; Philippines - Manila+; Indonesia - Jakarta/Bali; LA/San Diego